Nguyên văn phần góp ý cũ bằng Anh ngữ:
It is one thing to have an unjust preference, but it is another thing to act upon it.
When it comes to gay-marriage and sexual orientation, specifically those issues surrounding Proposition 8 on the November ballot in the state of California, I do have my own preference. But it wouldn't be precise to write down these thoughts, and to explain why I voted against my natural instinct if I start this entry with my own opinions and emotions. I think it's best to start from the two main characteristics of democracy from which the majority of people are making the decision and from which all people are guaranteed equal rights.
Conflicts in a democracy arise when the decision made by the majority does NOT provide equal rights to all. For those who tried, try, or will try to use democracy to support your arguments about legalizing gay marriage please think carefully here! What is at stake?
Democracy is truly a fragile concept. The imminent danger of a democracy will always be the tendency for society to succumb to the tyranny of the masses. That is proven to be true in California. Arguments have been passed back and forth by both supporters and non-supporters of Prop. 8 before and after voting day, ranging from constitution to religion, to sacredness, to inner fear, and even to the very definition of the word marriage.
Let's talk about the Constitution.
The Constitution is a barricade preventing people, as individuals, groups, or majorities from violating the most fundamental characteristic of democracy, which is equal rights for all members in its society. It's true that the Constitution is made by the people, can be put on a ballot and changed by the people; however in order to keep democracy alive, the Constitution cannot be amended to a point in which it is not capable to provide equal rights to all. A constitutional ban on gay marriage has that exact effect on the Constitution: stripping away a right from a minority group, depriving them the chance to acquire what is given by the state, not the church or any other group – the Marriage Certificate. With the slippery slope begun, which minority group should be next on the list? How do we know where it ends?
Let's talk about religion.
There's also talk about separation of church and state and that states should not require any church to marry gay and lesbian people. I believe Prop. 8 is about banning or legalizing gay marriage so that the State can grant gay and lesbian couples a marriage certificate. There is nothing in Prop. 8 which states that churches SHOULD marry gay people. And what if it does for some churches?
If the separation of church and state is not already here, then it should be to prevent churches from receiving federal money through faith-based funding; meanwhile, discriminating on the basis of religion, gender, and sexual orientation. If a Church does not want to marry gay people, it can simply avoid federal and state funding and then no one can tell that Church who to marry and who not to. But if a Church is thinking about that piece of cash from everybody's tax money – gay and atheists included – wouldn't it be hypocritical to say "this is a democracy" and call for separation of state and church so that we will not see gay people get married in a church? And wouldn't it be more hypocritical to bring sacredness in the word marriage, as defined by your religion, into the legal system… and yet, in the meantime, call for separation of state and church? For years we've been asked to recite "One nation, under God…" and no one said anything about separation of state and church. Should we start to put the issue on the table? I'm sure people who do not believe in The God would be interested.
Let's talk about sacredness.
Even though it is used widely in a religious sense, the word sacred in the English language is NOT strictly defined in religious terms. It can also mean that something is highly valued or important, period. This means that sacredness in marriage can have different values and importance to different groups of people with different ideology. In the end, it's not as holy or valuable or important as one would think it is (for himself/herself) when one try to convey the term to another person. Unless a specific group successfully narrowed down or changed the definition(s) in the English dictionary, sacred remains a general term carrying different meaning. When put together with the word marriage, sacred can mean many things or have no specific meaning at all. So if it has many meanings, one should not try to own it exclusively for a certain belief; marriage can still be sacred to atheists or gay/lesbian people as well. We generally speak English and use the word as we see fit in the English language. Regardless of what belief they have, marriage is sacred to those who actively seeking a marriage certificate from the State. What do you mean by "keeping it sacred"?
Let's talk about inner fear.
Clearly from the way certain individuals or school officials behave, there are fears about our kids being influenced at an early age by the pro-gay people out there. Well, I like women - especially the good looking ones – and I would very much prefer my son to be so. I would be quite disappointed if I had a son who turns out to be gay, but I think I should limit my fear to the fact that my children will not have equal access to gay and straight materials out there in the real world. If that can be achieved, then it's my responsibility to influence him as much as I can when he's young, and it's up to him to make a choice when he's old enough.
The bottom line is, if I failed to influence my own kid's belief in sexuality, who am I to think that I can influence the rest of the world's belief in sexuality? Even if I succeeded, screw the rest who think differently? For certain small fears about my future failure, I would rather oppose and walk over others out there? About my children's' sexual orientation, that would be a different battle - though related – which would be fought on different ground at a different time. Would I stand in this battle and fight dirty at all cost for fear of another battle? Perhaps not, I choose not to live in fear. Voting NO on Prop. 8 today will not directly affect their decision to be gay or lesbian lesbian tomorrow. However, voting YES will have a direct impact on others' lives, now!
But ah… there's the issue about adoption by gay/lesbian couples and the influence young orphans might be subjected to at an early age. Will I try to make ban adoption for homosexual couples? Will I give up my child for adoption? Do I think the fact that an orphan at the very least turns out to be a homosexual is better than the fact that he will turn out to be a gangster, illiterately wandering the street with a gun poking into your house? Should I make choices for those orphans whom I will not lift a finger to help? Do I know what is actually better for them? If I answer yes, I should go back and read this entry from the start again. If I form massive groups with people alike and us together as a mob would pursue our purpose with our own tyranny, there's always a greater cost to that. What should I truthfully fear?
Let's define and/or refine the definition of marriage.
Just like sacred, marriage in the English standard dictionary has at more than one definitions. Actually, there are at least three and only part, yes… just part, of the first definition confined marriage to a man and a woman – or two people of the opposite sex. And guess what the other part is: Two people of the same sex. Maddening eh? What to do? For years we have been using words loosely to a point that we don't even know what we or the other people are talking about and then suddenly when we happened to yell at each other while we all know we are both right, what do we do? We open our bibles, our guides, our books of beliefs and start yelling again thinking we are absolutely right. But remember, it's OUR books, our bibles, and our guides... not THEIRS.
But anyway, when it comes to the term marriage, I can compromise and wouldn't mind if it is strictly defined as "a union between two people of opposite sex". That's my preferred definition anyway. So many words in the English language has been commonly hi-jacked by religious groups nowadays, one more will not hurt. But in doing so, are we ready to change the lexicon of the English language? If not, there will just be more confusions and laughs. Civil Union rights alone is still not enough to grant equal rights to homosexual couples until one day the same certificate given by the State of California is issued to ANY two individuals who are joined for life. And if the word marriage is to be re-defined based on certain beliefs, it only fair to remove the word all together from our legal system and have the State issued certificates that spell out "CIVIL UNION CERTIFICATE". I would vote for that. Let's remove all confusions, stop trying to be right, and give respect to democracy under the protection of the Constitution from which all people are indeed equal.
Peace to those crying babies out there!!!!
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